Posted Tuesday 15th July 2014 By Ericka Waller
I never wanted to have daughters. I brooded over mini versions of my husband. Brown eyes like pools of chocolate. I never considered the idea of mini versions of me. I did not want to see myself reflected in someone else’s face. The thought of passing on my flaws and failings and fears horrified me. I wanted to harvest perfection, and I was so far from it.
Posted Thursday 26th June 2014 By Ericka Waller
I call my mum ‘the ministry of fun’. I mean it ironically. She is renowned for stopping people having a perfectly nice time, for no reason whatsoever. Last month when I went to visit her in France, she noticed me and dad having the best time ever doing the locomotion round the swimming pool (my top tip on how to mend a broken heart) and so turned off the CD player. No explanation, nothing. Then she marched back indoors to try and work out how to use her ‘tablet’ (MUM, please just call it a frigging notebook!)
Posted Monday 16th June 2014 By Ericka Waller
I used to say: “I don’t know how single parents manage”. Now I know, because I am one. My life as a mum is different now. It’s (even more) full on, on my own. There is no one to warm the milk while I run the bath, or help look for the tiny Dalmatian Thing-three can’t sleep without. No one to sort the dishwasher, laundry or run the hoover round. I’m a whirlwind, writing to do lists on loo rolls, making packed lunches at midnight, losing track of days.
Posted Sunday 15th June 2014 By Ericka Waller
I did not realise how many people I hated until it came to picking baby names. Every suggestion reminded me of someone I knew with bad breath, a dead tooth or the inability to close their mouth when breathing in.
Posted Thursday 29th May 2014 By Ericka Waller
I knew it was going to be a bad day when the first thing I did was wee on the cord of my dressing gown. I didn’t realise until I was walking downstairs and wondered what the cold, wet thing slapping against my leg was... “Ah, it’s my dressing gown cord, covered in my own urine.”