Do you regret when you got pregnant?

Posted Saturday 25th January 2014   By Ericka Waller

A recent article in the Telegraph discussed the ‘right’ time to have a baby. John Mirowsky, a sociologist from the university of Texas, believes that ’29 is the optimum age to birth if you want to feel fantastic in middle age and that 31 is the very “best age” to birth health-wise but also because social pressures on young mums “greatly outweighs the bio-developmental advantages of youthful organs”.’ Whatever that means.

Who knows when the right time to have a baby is. I had my first at 26 and my last at 30 and smugly thought I’d ‘Got it out the way nice and early’.

Now, at 32, my body and career lie in tatters, my kids are growing up too quickly, and I am far too battered and aware of what is involved to have another one.

I like that my children are so close in age but dislike the fact that it means Thing-three’s baby days are a blur.

I was so busy trying to keep up with a fifteen-month-old and a (put-out) three-year-old, I would sometimes look down to see Thing-three was sucking on the button of my cardigan instead of my breast. I’d not even noticed, and she had got used to taking what she could get.

Lying in the bath last night (prepare yourselves for too much information) I squeezed my nipples to see if milk still came out. I might as well tell you, as I know you now want to know, that the right one is as dry as a Jacobs Water Biscuit, but the left, under pressure, will still produce some beads of fluid.

Does this mean my body wants a baby even though my mind does not?  I am a woman after all. Making-up my mind has never been a strong point. “Up and down like a bride’s nightie”, the husband tells me.

Yeah right. That is what got me into this mess.

I don’t think 31 is the best age for a baby, or 28, or 40, or any other time. I don’t think there is ever a good or bad time to get pregnant.

As I was explaining to the husband just yesterday, the fact woman ovulate and have a period every month (he shuddered at these words and turned up Talk Sport radio very loudly) is because we have been designed for procreation. We don’t only ovulate when we are 17, or 30. We do it every bloody month for years and years (excuse the pun).

I’ve said this before, but is there ever a right time to press pause on all that you are, and give your whole being entirely over a baby? To sacrifice your job, pelvic-floor, interest in personal hygiene and ability to finish a sentence?

But then, by the same token, can anyone honestly say they regret the age they had their baby?