Breastfeed discreetly? No mum puts baby in a corner

Posted Monday 5th January 2015   By Ericka Waller

So apparently it’s rude to breastfeed in public. We should banish ourselves to a corner, for fear of embarrassing anyone. What next ladies? Will be we forced to practise chaupadi like they do in Nepal, where women are seen as so impure and untouchable when they are menstruating that they are not allowed to enter a house, touch animals, attend social events, or touch others. When they are served food, the person who gives it to them will not even touch the dish. And at night, they are not allowed to sleep in their home, they have to stay in roofless sheds.

What power us women have, to be so feared by men.

I love that our breasts are good enough to be on page three, earn a living in topless bars and sell bras on billboards, but are not allowed to be seen doing what they were made for.

I remember the first time I breastfed in public. Thing-one was two days old. I could not sit down because of my vandalised vagina, I was hallucinating from lack of sleep and my piles were poking out my pants. I did not give a shit about someone spotting my raspberry pink nipple before I guided my ravenous baby’s mouth towards it. She was so excited she was headbutting me and trying to suck the buttons on my shirt.  I was so traumatised about what I’d been through I could barely raise my mug to my mouth. If anyone had told me to sit in the corner I think I would have punched them.

If people find it awkward to watch someone breastfeeding, they could always look the other way. I find watching people being sick socially uncomfortable, so when passing a Brighton tramp bringing his Friday night Special Brews back up, I simply cross the street and think about something else (kittens, fluffy cushions, how to make the perfect poached egg). It’s not hard is it?

I don’t think it’s bad manners to breastfeed in public. My tiny breasts are so inoffensive it’s almost funny, and the few times my baby pulled off and milk spurted on the person opposite me in Starbucks, I always said sorry and offered to dab it off with my muslin.

What more can us poor lactating cows do?

Perhaps we should get them out for the lads first, let them all cop a feel, then casually drop in “after you have finished playing with them, do you mind if I nurse my baby?” This might make Jeremy Clarkson happy, who allegedly said: “men do not find breastfeeding natural. We find it deeply disturbing. This is because men do not see breasts as part of the reproductive process. We see them as a plaything, a toy”. This from a man who has made a living out of driving fast cars, no doubt to compensate for what must be lacking in *other* parts of his life.

At least us ladies get our tits out regardless of size.

Some of our fantastic mums have been posting their feeding selfies on BabyCentre, just because they can. And now, members of the BabyCenter US Community have joined in too!

We love every pic, so let’s hear it for the new trend in selfies!

Check out the Babycentre photo gallery