October 2015 Archive

Halloween's not like it used to be when I was a kid - Argus Friday 30th October 2015

Posted Saturday 31st October 2015   By Ericka Waller

When I was a kid, Halloween meant a toffee apple (that would require teeth made from dominoes to bite into) on sale by the till and ‘trick-or-treating’ round the green outside the local pub, where most people told us to “jog on”, chasing us to make sure we did so. Now, the first three aisles of ASDA are dedicated to fake cobwebs, jack-o-lanterns, masks and ghouls to hang round the house. My four-year-old is so scared we have to shop elsewhere for the month.

I think I’m turning into a werewolf (once a month)

Posted Thursday 29th October 2015   By Ericka Waller

So I am due on, again. So annoying. Normally my period sneaks up on me, and I am shocked when it happens, and wander out the toilet in an epiphanic daze, all ‘so that’s why I dropped my iPhone and smashed the screen.. and why I wanted to punch the person in front of me at Tesco’s because he was wearing chequered trousers. That tantrum I had about the children not taking my Wookie teddy and dressing it in a Build-a-Bear dress is also seeming a bit childish now.’

36 things that make having three (or more) children harder

Posted Thursday 29th October 2015   By Ericka Waller

So I was watching this family of four the other day, as I was out with mine. The two children were sitting quietly. They had elbows off the table and straight backs in their chairs. While they were waiting for their meals (which they ate all of with gusto) they practised reading. Opposite them, their mum and dad were reading the weekend papers, discussing worthy issues, giggling at things, in their pristine Fat Face white jumpers. My children were eating the sweets I’d bribed them with in order to sit down. They were having a competition to see who could kick one-another the hardest under the table. This movement caused me to spill my tea down my Ebay Obey t-shirt (oh the irony). I’d mopped the rest of the scolding hot tea up with the paper, so had nothing to read, not that I could concentrate anyway, with the kids all singing ‘I know the planets one by one‘ to the tune of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star (very loudly and not in tune). I realised, not for the first time, that when you have three children, you are in a very different club to those who have two. So much so, I’ve made a list:

Too busy looking ahead to just be happy in the present - Argus Friday23rd October 2015

Posted Friday 23rd October 2015   By Ericka Waller

I saw this post on Facebook the other day. It was a cartoon of two people. One of them was stood empty-handed; the other had a massive jar in his hands labelled ‘Happiness’. “Hey” said the empty-handed cartoon, “where did you get that? I’ve been looking for it everywhere” The man with the happiness jar said “I made it myself”. It made me think. Can happiness ever be bought, or can it only come when we make it for ourselves?

All young drivers should see viral car crash video - Argus Friday 16th October 2015

Posted Friday 16th October 2015   By Ericka Waller

I first heard news of the Crowborough crash via Facebook. A friend had shared the video with the title 'Horror video captures final minutes of two friends who speed to their death'. This was in among a news feed of what people were having for dinner and dogs who look like their owners. Initially, I was appalled. I could not understand how sharing the video footage, retrieved from the accident site, could possibly be of any benefit to anyone. How could something so personal, so distressing, be Facebook feed fodder?

Mornings in my house

Posted Friday 16th October 2015   By Ericka Waller

So another school morning has been and gone. It’s 9.30am. My house looks like it got raided by the police and I’m ready for bed. Why does this always happen? I start planning for the school run at 8pm the night before. I lay out tomorrow’s clothes on the sofa, in the order the girls need to put them on. I put bowls, spoons and cereal on the table. I prepare reading bags and lunchboxes. I lay shoes by the front door. I line up toothbrushes, vitamins and face creams, set up the ‘hairdressing station’ with sprays, brushes and an assortment of bands and clips.

Sentence pales in comparison to henious crime - Argus Friday 9th October 2015

Posted Friday 9th October 2015   By Ericka Waller

Who can we trust? The Former Bishop of Lewes, Peter Ball, was sentenced to 32 months in prison over sex offences. It is said he ‘abused’ his power to exploit young aspiring priests for his own "selfish sexual motive". Between 1977 and 1992 he abused 18 boys. Now aged 83, Ball will serve just half of his sentence in custody, meaning jail time of just one month for each of his victims.

The ultimate childrens birthday party

Posted Tuesday 6th October 2015   By Ericka Waller

So I’m still recovering from Thing-three’s fourth birthday party yesterday. It was such a success I feel qualified to give my tips on how to throw the ultimate kids party. 1. Never have it at home I can’t stress this enough. It is never worth it. Kids need lots of room to run around, pop balloons and scream. Unless you live in an old disused orphanage, hold it somewhere else. I booked out the hall at my local community centre. It had an outside space and a kitchen. This meant the children could go mad in the hall, while the parents hid outside drinking tea and eating olives and hobnobs.

Car drivers here should give up caffine instead

Posted Friday 2nd October 2015   By Ericka Waller

Do you know who I am? We finally know who Ronnie Pickering is this week, after the ex ‘bare-knuckle fighter’ from Hull was caught on camera being rather hostile to the motorcyclist in front who was waiting to turn right. Pickering decided the motorcyclist was taking too long to make his manoeuvre. From the video, the delay looked due to the fact there were cars coming in the other direction, but ‘One-punch-Ronnie’ was in a hurry and started beeping his Citron Picasso horn in an aggressive fashion, before following the biker and demanding he stop his bike so Ronnie could call him a string of obscenities before asking ‘Do you know who I am?’ four or five times, then offering him a fist fight. The motorcyclist, Mr Steve Middleton said “When he said 'Do you know who I am?', I thought he was going to say he is some sort of gangster. I don't know of any gangsters in Hull.”

Why running makes me a better mum

Posted Friday 2nd October 2015   By Ericka Waller

I first started running when I was 22 and had replaced cigarettes for baguettes and cream cheese. Before long I could not fit into my clothes. Luckily for me, the place I was working at had a gym on-site. To my shame, I discovered that I was so unfit, it would be dangerous for me to try running on the treadmill. I was instructed (by the awesome Elle, who was my fitness inspiration and is still my biggest girl crush of all time) to power-walk, then add a slope in slowly.